Robson On The Streets For Finding Best Swimming Goggles

Former England Legend, now a hobo

Robson: Will Manage for Food

Is this Robbo?

Tomlinson: Gave mouthful

Former England hero Bryan Robson is HOMELESS, the Onion Bag can exclusively reveal. The sometime captain of his country and ex-Man Utd star has been down on his luck since quitting playing at the age of 51. He famously managed Middlesbrough for what seemed like decades, doing nothing very impressive, before leaving 'by mutual consent' (aka getting the boot) in 2001.

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Coal Truck

Since then, the down on his luck loser has been tramping the country like a tinker, searching for that elusive new job in football. He frequently travels the length and breadth of the country, hopping freight trains at night to avoid paying the fare.

His stops have included Coventry, Birmingham, Ipswich, Stoke, Aston Villa, West Ham, Crystal Palace, and most recently, Bradford. But none of them wanted him. And a spokesman for Stoke didn't say: "That old dosser?".

Johnny Foreigner

He's also tried his luck abroad, surprising illegal immigrants hurrying into Britain through the Channel Tunnel by heading the other way. World famous Danish club FC Copenhagen-Daz, and the national sides of the Republic of Ireland and Nigeria have all slammed the door in his face, amid accusations of inflated salaries, drinking cultures, and generally being crap.

Will Manage for food

The Onion Bag's intrepid reporter Larry Gak last night caught up with a dishevelled hobo going through the bins outside Bradford City's Valley Parade. The dirty-faced mongrel, who was wearing an England number 7 shirt, asked Gak: "Shruhghjhamamanagerandafewpenceforacuppateap?", who replied: "Are you Bryan Robson?". At this point, the hobo stuffed a cardboard notice saying "Will Manage for Food" inside his threadbare coat and scuttled off down a back alley.

We asked Sky Sports telly girl Claire Tomlinson if she had any idea where Robson was now. She issued this statement through her solicitor: "Why don't you find? off, you filthy jizz-drinking".

Castro