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Football fans are in for a televisual feast from the start of next month as a new Sky Digital channel takes its place in the TV listings.

Anti-Football

ESPN Dishwater aims to give fans up and down the country a new service which it claims has been demanded by the fans for many years but which has been largely overlooked by other TV companies thus far. Senior Vice President of ESPN, Skip Dongworthy said:

"Football fans in the UK are fed up of switching on their TVs to watch prestige football games on Sky, the BBC and so on. There's no longer any cache to broadcasting the Premier League, Champions League or England's 2010 World Cup qualifiers because the public are disillusioned with it all. They're demanding good old-fashioned rubbish like they used to have, and that's what we're going to give them."

Dregs galore

True to his word, ESPN Dishwater will be showing a wide range of awful football from its archives that's universally regarded as dull, boring or just plain uninteresting. Fronted by anchorman Elton Welsby, the channel has amongst its first week treats 'The George Graham Years' - a documentary on the man they called the Master of Monotony - 'Swindon Town: The '55/'56 Season' and 'Great Goal Kicks of Our Time'.

Turnip TV

The following month sees a week-long season of special programmes looking back at Graham Taylor's spell in charge of the England team, plus for real enthusiasts there's a daily edition of classic BBC 'Final Score's featuring classified results from years gone by read out by the late Len Martin.

Inside sources say ITV Digital may be thinking of producing a similar channel of its own, while the Hallmark channel says it may interested in a similar venture of its own. QVC were unavailable for comment.

Chris O