Mourning Mourinho

Johnny laments the passing of a sub-editor's dream

Pundit: No egg on his face

Poot: Another universe

Hendrix: Pre-dated by Poot

Funny old thing, Football. For instance, Sir Jose of Stamford. Like hacks all over the world, I'm mourning Mourinho. The man's a copy magnet. Someone took our story away.

Gave good quote

Journos' word processors will be processing considerably fewer words, of considerably duller quality, after Thursday. In many ways, Jose reminds me of Henry Poot, manager of Blackburn Rovers over the 1967-68 season. Henry was similarly urbane, good-looking and "gave good quote". The difference was, The Pootster was rather more out of left field than The Special One. We duly wrote up his thoughts after each game; none of us knew what they meant; but they sounded great. Looking back, Poot was the football equivalent of those Pink Floyd chaps.

Goose the sky

For instance, when Rovers were demolished by Norwich City in the Cup, Poot opined: "Egg and peas were all over the tablecloth", thought to be a reference to the teams' respective strips. After a disallowed goal, Poot pondered: "Does the goal exist, perhaps, in another Universe? Is it peeking around the doors of our perception, calling Yoo-hoo? If that's the case, metaphysically, should it not, literally, be counted?" When Rovers put seven past Burnley, Poot riffed: "Rovers are in seventh heaven, a million miles high/'Scuse me while I goose the sky."

Great Nancy

Of course, such wilful obscurity is easier to explain in retrospect. Blackburn in 1967 was more at home to soft furnishings than soft drugs, but of course it turned out that Poot was on the wacky baccy. Things came to a head when he gave Nancy the Ewood Park cleaner a run-out at right back against Man Utd. He might have got away with it, as Nancy scored the equaliser. Unfortunately, though, Nancy's absence meant the board room was left filthy on match day, so Poot had to go.

Toodle-oo,

Johnny Pundit